


sometimes i wanna love myself like i love you

by letfelicitysoar



Category: VIXX
Genre: M/M, hyuken, hyukeo, keo - Freeform, luck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-02
Updated: 2015-07-02
Packaged: 2018-04-07 06:35:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,413
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4253070
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/letfelicitysoar/pseuds/letfelicitysoar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Spring truly is the season for love to bloom.</p>
            </blockquote>





	sometimes i wanna love myself like i love you

Taekwoon has already known for months, Jaehwan doesn’t know a thing until it hits him square in the face.

Sanghyuk leaves in the spring.

-

“You’re definitely not getting to pick what we eat tonight,” Jaehwan says, sprawled across Taekwoon’s legs while balancing his phone and a take-out menu in both hands.

“At least when I pick, we actually go out,” says Sanghyuk on the other couch, nose scrunched up at the choice of food Jaehwan has decided the three of them will eat tonight.

Taekwoon doesn’t protest, if it were up to him, they’d stay in and eat something homemade instead of going out for gopchang or ordering cheap pizza. He seldom chooses though and Jaehwan takes advantage of this, always stirring up arguments with Sanghyuk over just about anything he can seem to argue about, even things he can bullshit his way through with. When the pizza arrives, Sanghyuk peels practically everything off, a sour expression on his face as Jaehwan grins back, nothing but innocent. Dinner is expelled quickly, Sanghyuk still inhaling everything even though he avoids cheese and olives and tomatoes and basically everything but the crust and meat.

In the early morning, when Jaehwan wakes up, it’s because Sanghyuk’s sharp elbow hits him in the ribs.

“What the fuck,” he sighs out, rubbing at his eyes and reaching up to grab at Sanghyuk’s waist as the other tries to escape the confines of the bed. “Where are you going?”

“I have to pee,” says Sanghyuk, almost whispering it so as to not wake Taekwoon. He squirms out of Jaehwan’s grasp who practically lets go at this point, not going to hold Sanghyuk back any longer, even though he desperately doesn’t want to. It’s just the bathroom, Sanghyuk will be back.

It takes forever for Taekwoon to wake up, it usually does at least, but as soon as Sanghyuk is crawling back into the warm sheets wrapped around his hyungs, Taekwoon pulls him into his arms before Jaehwan even has a fucking chance to. He sighs into Sanghyuk’s skin, warm and comfortable, snuggling his nose into the crook of Sanghyuk’s neck, inhaling him in that weird way he usually does. To their side, Jaehwan whines, softly, but whatever free arm Sanghyuk has goes immediately to pet Jaehwan’s hair. If Jaehwan had the option to, he’d kick Taekwoon out of their– _his_ bed.

-

The chance strikes when Jaehwan goes over after an early ended shift, Sanghyuk home alone while Taekwoon is still at work. The words roll off with a little too much excitement, Jaehwan already crawled up on Sanghyuk’s lap and straddling him.

“Can I fuck you?” Jaehwan asks with such mannerism, it’s laughable.

Sanghyuk snorts into his shoulder, face pressed away with embarrassment. “What?”

“Can I fuck you? Like. Not with Taekwoon. You and me. Just us two,” Jaehwan says, haltingly. “Can I?”

“Just the two of us?” Sanghyuk asks, voice teasing as his smile falters.

“Just the two of us,” Jaehwan confirms, steady, hands bracing Sanghyuk’s shoulders.

The other trembles, if only slightly, before he lets out a shaky breath. “We’ve never. Uhm. Just the two of us? Really? That’s what you want to do?”

“Yes,” he nods, voice assured and eyes looking pleadingly at Sanghyuk, who in turn casts his gaze downwards.

“Okay.”

-

Jaehwan couldn’t have gotten their clothes off any faster than he did, possibly a world record somewhere, but who between the two was even counting the seconds? Kissing Sanghyuk is familiar grounding, he’s allowed that at least, soft lips pressed roughly against each other, Jaehwan’s movements urgent and far too feverish. He feels like his entire body is on fire with the way Sanghyuk just _lets_ him touch wherever. No stray hand is coming out of no where to push him away, to halt him, to build an invisible wall between him and Sanghyuk. Jaehwan can kiss and touch and do as much as he pleases, Sanghyuk is _his_ for now.

“Slow down,” he chuckles, breathless, beautiful. Jaehwan keeps moving forward, afraid of when the time may slip through his fingers, Sanghyuk is pliant for once in his arms and there is no way in hell that Jaehwan is going to let that go wasted.

He can’t really be creative now, the couch will have to do because in his mind, the bedroom is too far away. There isn’t much of an option for him here either, having to push Sanghyuk on his back, trailing his fingers over Sanghyuk’s nipples, making him groan and sweat whenever Jaehwan touches a spot too sensitive. He doesn’t really pay attention to Sanghyuk’s torso, mainly because that’s where Taekwoon spends most of his time, peppering and marking the beautiful milky skin that Jaehwan wants to so badly run his nails down and leave marks deeper, redder, than anything _gentle_ Taekwoon could ever leave on Sanghyuk.

But Jaehwan moves his attention downwards, eyes scanning Sanghyuk’s smooth thighs, his hands coming to wrap around the bare skin, feeling the heat radiating off the other. He kisses him there, sucks lightly until just the faintest of reds begin to form and then Jaehwan spreads Sanghyuk’s legs apart.

He knows where the lube is by now, because he’s been over so many times and let Taekwoon fuck him more than he’d like, but there’s a bottle and some misplaced condoms in the nice little convenient drawer under the coffee table and Jaehwan takes no time in sliding it open and pulling the needed contents out.

Sanghyuk hasn’t done much but lay on his back, panting because he simply can’t do anything, not with how fast Jaehwan is moving, with how needy and fervent he is right now. It’s a little unnerving for him, but he figures that even Jaehwan could need a bone thrown at him every now and then. When Jaehwan moves back in between his legs again, Sanghyuk lets him, lets him slide two cool, slick fingers in him as Jaehwan leans forward to kiss Sanghyuk, teeth clumsily knocking against each other’s. It’s a slightly new sensation to Sanghyuk, who’s ever really been prepped by Taekwoon, the older male not even letting himself do it when he wanted to be playful. He can only imagine what it’s going to be like with Jaehwan’s dick, which presses hard against his thigh.

“Wait, I don’t–” Sanghyuk chokes out, gulping in heaps of air.

“You don’t want to do this?” Jaehwan asks, a little put out, but his fingers don’t even stutter as they still fuck into Sanghyuk.

“N-No, that’s not it,” he pants out, trying to let his brain form the words he’s looking for. “It’s a little, o-overwhelming.”

Jaehwan chuckles against his collar bones, letting his moist lips mouth gently at Sanghyuk’s heated skin. He doesn’t relent in thrusting his fingers into the younger, eventually adding a third and shifting so that his bare cock can grind down on Sanghyuk’s own hard on. When Sanghyuk is practically begging Jaehwan for more (just like he’s always imagined it), the other slides his fingers out, immediately replacing it for his dick (finally, _finally_ ), bracing himself and kissing Sanghyuk more to ease the other of any pain. Of course it shouldn’t hurt anymore, Jaehwan figures, but he’s still careful none the less, still acting like it’s Sanghyuk’s first time, because at least with Jaehwan it is.

He fucks him like that, against the pleather couch, skin sweaty and sticking annoyingly to the surface. Sanghyuk’s knees pressed to his chest as his ankles cross behind Jaehwan’s neck. Jaehwan’s voice is gravely when he comes, right into Sanghyuk, another image that he’s let play in his mind multiple times before. His hand rests in between the two, loosely fitted around Sanghyuk’s dick as he strokes him, pulls him into climax, letting Sanghyuk spill all over their abdomens. He doesn’t care, Jaehwan doesn’t care if Sanghyuk makes him a complete mess, if he drags a trail of blood and dirt with Jaehwan into nothing but absolutely ruin. Jaehwan doesn’t care as long as it’s Sanghyuk.

-

Taekwoon fucking hates the amusement park, but it was Jaehwan’s idea to come here and he’s long ago stopped arguing with everything that Jaehwan wants to do. Most of the time, he just lets himself be dragged off anywhere.

But, today is particularly special, it being Jaehwan’s graduation from that horrible art school he’s spent the last three years at. It’s actually the day after, but the three had gotten so caught up in fucking that they forgot to properly celebrate. Beside him, Sanghyuk is grinning like the child he claims he isn’t.

“Hyuk-ah,” Taekwoon says gently, brushing a leaf out of his hair. “Are you having fun?”

“Of course,” Sanghyuk answers immediately, smile so blinding that Taekwoon ponders how he has ever directly looked at the other before. Sanghyuk is so beautiful.

“I’m having fun too!” Jaehwan screeches, holding a plethora of colorful balloons that he no doubt payed way too much for. “Are you?”

Taekwoon nods, a tiny smile playing on his lips, especially when Jaehwan leans closer to his face, eyes squinted as he inspects the other. “I don’t believe you,” he says momentarily, pulling insistently on his sleeve. “Ride the pirate ship with me.”

His eyes flicker over to Sanghyuk, who for once, looks like he’s going to puke if he rides anything more. Jaehwan hands him the balloons, instructing him to not let a single one loose before he wraps three fingers around Taekwoon’s slim wrist and drags him off to the start of the line. The ride feels like hell, especially with Jaehwan right beside him, screaming in his ear and squeezing the life out of his arm. Taekwoon finds that he doesn’t really mind thought, that he likes it. Likes Jaehwan, even.

When they’re back on the floor, Jaehwan’s legs feeling like jelly and Taekwoon holding him upright, he sees Sanghyuk waiting for them across the way.

It’s already been a few months, but no matter what, Taekwoon seems to always see the sad look on Sanghyuk’s beautiful, smiling face.

-

“You’re leaving?” he asks when Sanghyuk meets him in the hall, suitcase in hand (where did he even get that?) and eyes looking everywhere else but at Jaehwan’s.

Sanghyuk doesn’t answer with his voice, but instead shakes his head, a soft breath of air escaping his lips as he breezes past Jaehwan towards the living room.

Jaehwan can’t believe the situation right now, not when just moments ago, hours ago, he was wrapped up in between Sanghyuk and Taekwoon. The warmth of the others making him falsely believe all of this could be forever. _That Sanghyuk would be forever_. Surely, he thinks, Taekwoon will stop him, use that intimidating voice of his, that gaze of his to stop Sanghyuk from creating this impending doom from happening.

But, Sanghyuk pauses in front of Taekwoon on his way out and frowns before he leaves. No words of farewell or even some sort of explanation laced with an apology. He just leaves.

That night Jaehwan lays awake in his bed and it’s been so long since he’s last even used his bed, the mattress feels lumpy and the sheets are too crisp under his fingers. There’s an emptiness somewhere, but Jaehwan can’t pin it down. When it’s late in the night, later than he’s used to waiting for sleep to take over, he rises and pads his way down the hall to Taekwoon’s room. The elder male has always been much more of a cuddler, but right now it’s Jaehwan pushing his door open and crawling into bed with him, Taekwoon pulling the sheets aside and scooting over for Jaehwan to lay beside him.

-

It’s spring when Taekwoon tells Sanghyuk he loves him.

“Well,” Sanghyuk looks up from the book he’s reading. “I already knew that.”

Taekwoon throws a pillow at him and Sanghyuk rolls onto the floor laughing, dropping his book and losing his page. He looks up at his hyung, smiling deviously when he pulls the other down, Taekwoon isn’t even putting up a fight against it. Because Sanghyuk knows him well, he knows that Taekwoon expects kisses and cuddles if he lets Sanghyuk pull him down, and well, he’s fucking right about that.

“I love you too,” Sanghyuk confesses moments later, cheeks just a little pink, but he puts it off as him just needing a minute to breathe.

“I already knew that,” Taekwoon teases, tone reflecting Sanghyuk’s. He gets tackled again and Sanghyuk practically melts into him.

-

It’s spring when Jaehwan moves in with them.

“Ah,” he sighs, looking around the familiar room. “The time for love to blossom.”

“That’s such a line,” Sanghyuk says from his spot on the couch, nose scrunched up. “A really corny one too.”

“It is so not,” Jaehwan whines before flopping down into Taekwoon’s lap. “So, what are we eating for dinner tonight?”

“Gop-”

“Not that,” says Jaehwan immediately. Taekwoon silently agrees by carding a hand through his hair. Jaehwan purrs.

“You both suck,” Sanghyuk pouts and leans back on the couch.

Jaehwan snickers, but he picks anyways, this time it’s cheap chinese food, the kind that isn’t really chinese food, but he likes it enough. They eat in their usual playfulness, Sanghyuk sucking everything into his mouth like a vaccuum and Taekwoon being stingy with his portion, even when Jaehwan does his best aegyo. The days could on like this forever, Jaehwan thinks innocently. The three of them, going to work and school, coming home to each other, bleeding out their stress with cheap take-out and kisses that used to be meaningless, but have recently become filled with so much affection that Jaehwan’s chest constricts at just the thought alone.

Spring truly is the season for love to bloom.

He’ll never admit it himself, or even get the chance to say it aloud, but he’s in love.

-

Taekwoon’s bed, the one that they’ve shared countless of times together, seems suddenly far too big. It isn’t even spacious in the first place, the memory of an elbow poking into Jaehwan’s ribs suddenly resurfacing. But, at the moment, with just Taekwoon and Jaehwan, it feels infinitely open, like there’s just too much room for the  two.

“Just the two of us?” Jaehwan asks in a voice much too small and quiet to be his own, but it is.

Taekwoon holds him closer, skin cool and fingers trembling when they comb softly into Jaehwan’s hair. “Just the two of us.”

**Author's Note:**

> finALLY WRITES THAT OT3 FIC I HAVE BEEN DYING TO WRITE SINCE SPRING.
> 
> if it's confusing, let me say that luck were a couple waaaaAaAay before ken weaseled his way in there. leo is possessive, ken hates him at first, but they get along and do love each other. but they'll never love each other as much as they love hyuk. 
> 
> //aoa's just the two of us plays in the bg as i roll out//


End file.
